My Dad one day informs me that he is going to start looking for a job and will be moving to Peace River soon... So we make a plan. Dad THEN decides, the plan takes to long, so again, he informs me that he has randomly walked off his current job and is moving to Peace River... TODAY, as in that day. It was a grand time. I then thought to myself, "what about the boys?!" then began the week full of choices... and not the easy "white or brown bread?" choices it was more like "sacrifice my own child I'm in the process of adopting? or take in my brothers and make sure they are taken care of until they are of age?" yeah... that kind of decision. My heart was at war with... well my heart. I then heard some quotes that changed the way my heart felt...
"I remember my mother's prayers and they have always followed me. They have clung to me all my life." ~Abraham Lincoln
"If you have a mom, there is nowhere you are likely to go where a prayer has not already been." ~Robert Brault
"All women become like their mothers. That is their tragedy. No man does. That's his." ~Oscar Wilde, The Importance of Being Earnest, 1895
"Biology is the least of what makes someone a mother." ~Oprah Winfrey
These quotes reminded me of my mother, it was also so close to mothers day that I was thinking about her a lot anyway and when I read these I remembered how often my mom told me she prayed for me and wanted to support me in everything. She knew God had given me a heart that cares about others and she prayed for her kids and grandkids... even though she didn't get the chance to meet them. God gave her a heart that sacrificed day after day to make us kids happy and she prayed that we would in turn, follow her example and love God and our kids like she loved us. I was blessed to have such a beautiful woman to guide me and pray for me all those years..... anyway, now I'm rambling.... BACK to my story!
I felt like if my mom could make those sacrifices and pray for me all those years... I could do the same, people keep telling me I am so much like her anyway!... So I made the difficult choice to put my adoption on hold and am in the process to become a legal guardian for two teenage boys. I'll also be buying the house my dad was living in so that they have a place to call home..... It blows my mind how God works and changes our lives when we just let it go. These choices have been SO hard to make, I have face many trails and down days in between but through it all God is good. There have been many verses that have encouraged me along the way, God has used His Word to show me how HIS will is best and HE has got my back (it's like I never really learn that lesson!) So if you feel like your heart is just in need of some reassurance, here is what God wants you to remember.....
"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose."
Romans 8:28
"To humans belong the plans of the heart,
but from the Lord comes the proper answer of the tongue."
but from the Lord comes the proper answer of the tongue."
Proverbs 16:1
"Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever."
Hebrews 13:8
My heart may feel so overwhelmed so many times, but God has a plan, it is good and that will NEVER change.... oh what beautiful promises He has given us!
Well I think that is all I have to blog for now! I hope my next post won't be so long from now!
Ta Ta For Now!
God will bless you greatly, Nicole. Sometimes sacrificing what we want for what God would rather have for us...is a hard pill to swallow. But in the end...God's way are far more better than our own. Follow God's way...He wrote the map. He is the only way.
ReplyDeleteGod bless you richly for your sacrifice.
i feel like i've come late to the party (seeing as how you've been blogging since jan), but you do have a wonderful way with words! I loved/love reading your adventure so far and i am excited to hear about the dreams God has given you and how faithful you are to listen to Him. Keep it up, gurrrrrrl :)
ReplyDeletei'm sure it wasn't easy, but those are so lucky, and God will bless you greatly!
ReplyDeleteWow Nicole! You have made the right choice, the journey may be rough but the guys need a form of stability. They know you and know you care about them. I want you to know I will support you in this and be available for whatever you need(I don't have teens but I do have kids!) I will be praying for you.
ReplyDeleteNicole you're amazing and SO much like your mom. Those boys are so lucky to have someone like you looking out for them. If your heart feels good by your decision then you are definately doing the right thing. We luv yah!
ReplyDelete